Only "nappy heads" may apply term?

Alan Davieson:

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Nappy-head, it turns out (excuse my whiteyness), means a black person who has allowed their hair to grow naturally into a tightly curled afro. It’s a term that can be used self-referentially with pride or disparagingly about others. Being a racial thing, its power is in the mouth of the speaker. Or is it in the ear of the listener? It’s complicated, so, in the interests of a quiet life, don’t use it unless you are very confident or, in fact, a nappy-head.

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Among friends, thankfully, you can draw your own line. Wesley and Donald, two friends of mine from Edmonton, were discussing Donald’s attempts to sell his house after the break-up of his marriage. Donald was talking about some people who’d said they’d buy and then went back on the deal they’d shaken on.

“White folks?” said Wesley. “Yeh, they was white,” replied Donald. “Can’t trust Whitey,” said Wesley. “Nope,” said Donald, “you sure can’t trust Whitey.”

This observation had a poignancy and surprising air of veracity about it as well as being amusing, given that Wesley and Donald are both white.

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This affair got blown out of proportion because many blacks are too insecure to endure insults with a smile. Too many find the experience painful, because they are still painfully insecure. The insecurity is raced based.i.e., They understand that the insult is not an insult but a joke when said by another "nappy head" but they feel really bad when a "whitey" says it because he might mean it. We will know that maturity and self confidence has improved when they can laugh at the insults or ignore it who ever the source. That, after all, is what "whitey" does.