'New' terrorist guidlines at DHS?

Borowitz Report:

In the wake of the Christmas Day airline terror attempt, the Department of Homeland Security today said it was instituting a bold new series of security measures, including issuing an official "proof of terrorism" I.D. card.

"All potential terrorists must have the terrorist I.D. card in order to be barred from boarding," said Homeland Security secretary Janet Napolitano. "If you want to get on the no-fly list you'll need a completed application and the $25 fee."

Ms. Napolitano said that while the terror suspect's father had warned the U.S. about his son weeks before the incident, the Homeland Security Dept. was tightening rules in that area as well: "In the future, it will be necessary for a terrorist's mom and dad to warn us before we take it seriously."

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It is pretty good satire and Napolitano's actions have been a target rich environment. I think he needed to work something in about checking to see if the terrorist has clean underwear.

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